Taking back the home... something that's really been on my heart lately.
I used to stand in the kitchen and think, here I am working, cooking, cleaning, what's he doing? Nothing, exactly. (Remember the Adam and Eve curse, well there ya go!) He gets to come home, kick up his feet, and watch tv. I have to make sure everything around the house is done, food made, and bills made. WAH WAH WAH. I felt incredibly bad for myself. I mean shouldn't I? My life was UNFAIR! I think about how I acted and wow, what a brat. Now I'm not saying I wasn't "justified" in some of my thinking, but I definitely had a sense of entitlement.
I was raised in a home that it was pretty equal. My dad was good about taking care of himself and my mom took care of us and the house. It was closer to a 50/50 or at least there wasn't one side that had to do a lot more than the other. They were very compromising.
My hubby came from a family where the wife was the homemaker. The dad was the provider. So, he was accustomed to the woman doing all the laundry, cooking, cleaning, bills, and etc. Which again isn't wrong, just different then how I was raised.
Basically our expectations were set for failure. I couldn't understand why he wouldn't help and he couldn't understand why I wasn't just doing it. With the Lord's help we have worked through issues and given a little on each side. Nate is more willing to help and I'm more willing to do more. Isn't that funny how that works? Once someone decides to be the bigger person things tend to fall in line. Hopefully anyway.
I have come along way with my feminist thinking. I still pretty well struggle with it and will probably always, but there are somethings I'd like to share that have changed me.
I always looked at cooking as a slaves job. lol. Seriously though. It was annoying, took a long time, and was gone in like 10 seconds. Why couldn't we just run through mcd's? No mess, no hassle. The more I cook the more I enjoy it. It's because it gets easier. You get more ideas of what to make. You can whip up something quickly instead of taking all day. What's really changed my heart about cooking? The Lord. I have been praying that he gives me a new heart towards it. Not just in cooking, but in homemaking all together. He has answered my prayers..
Today while I was standing in the kitchen I thought about something pretty cool. I have the HONOR and PRIVILEGE to provide my family with food. Food that will nourish their bodies and allow them to maintain function. Think about what God gives us... spiritual food. Food that allows us to walk in a closer relationship with Him and function in that relationship. Pretty cool connection.
Please do not get me wrong. I have been a work in progress for about 5 years over cooking, but thankfully the Lord has opened my heart to it. I actually get so happy when I cook for others. I'm realizing that the Lord blesses me when I do. There is a sense of accomplishment as well. It's not only filling bellies, but also filling my soul.
Yeah, all that from cooking. lol. Something else I've been thinking about lately is family time. We have so many distractions and things we just have to do that take away from our family. Whether it's the tv, sports, school, work, shopping, or etc. Let's tell satan NO. We are taking our families back! Let's show are kids that they mean MORE than all these material things. Let's make our kids slow down and spend some time with us. I feel like that's why we have more lost kids then ever. They can't maintain a relationship with the Lord because they don't even have one with their parents. Do not get me wrong, you do not have to have a good home life to have a fulfilling and spiritual walk with God, but why wouldn't we as parents want to do the very best we could to get them there.
Women. Let's take pride in our homes again. Let's love on our children. Let's make supper. Let's play a game with our kids. Let's kiss our husbands. I'm talking to myself as well in this!
The main thing I keep praying for is the Lord to turn me into the woman HE wants me to be. He has lightened my heart. I still have days that are better than others, but I seem to be finding that I am having more better days then bad.
He has also changed my heart and attitude towards things. I used to be very angry and would get extremely upset, but He's shown me that's not right. It is not shining His light at all and He is not being honored. The devil is winning again. God did not promise us we wouldn't struggle, but He did promise us that He would be there with us. (I know I heard that somewhere, or read it, just love it!) My father is walking me through these changes and I'm so thankful because I know He is in my heart. I want to be HIS servant in whatever or wherever He puts me. I want my children to see His light in me and know why I do the things I do!
Right now His calling on my heart is to be at home with my children and to be the best homemaker to my ability. I'm not saying I'm going to start churning my own butter or making my own flour, but just doing little things for my family to show them I care.
If you are a working mom I do understand how hard it is. Maybe you could pray the Lord find a way for you and your husband to work together and be homemakers together. I can't imagine having to work full time and then come home and do all you do! My hat goes off to you! Maybe have a day on the weekend that is just time for you and the kids to play games. Whatever you choose seek HIM first! :)
I do not want anyone to feel less of a wife/mom if they don't feel the same way I do, but I just felt like I should share what the Lord has done in my heart and maybe if you are on the path I was it can help you too!
Either way we all need to pray that the Lord guide our hearts to walk the path He has for us! May God be with you on your journey with your family and let's all TAKE BACK OUR HOMES! Let's tell satan to shove it and we are raising our kids, he is not! Praise GOD for His grace and understanding!
Proverbs 3:6 "In all your ways acknowledge Him, And He will make your paths straight."